Dread Wolf Take You
by KitiaraKazuma
Summary: The Dread Wolf is feared and awed by many, hunted by others. But he has a weakness and he doesn't like it one bit. Will Alas Lavellan be able to get him off his destructive path or fall before him like so many others?


**Dread Wolf take you**

 **Prelude**

The cold autumn wind was dragging relentlessly at her heavy woolen coat as the elven woman hurried through the nightly forest. A warm bundle of cloth was resting silently in her trembling arms, but she tried to ignore it as best as she could. "There is no other way…" she muttered to herself under her breath. Shrieks and howls of nocturnal beast filled the crisp air and the thought of them following her was driving her even faster through the Brecillian forest. It was no ordinary forest and even by daylight the clan avoided wandering too far from the frequented routes. The Veil was thin here; their keeper had told them that plenty of times over the cracking campfire and she could feel it now too. As if any minute starving spirits or demons were trying to make the final step across the Veil and into the world of the living. Ahead of her the gnarly trees were making room for a small clearing covered by elfroot and felandaris, the demon root as the keeper called it. The little bundle in her arms was stirring and whimpering piteously as she entered the clearing. "…no other way…I can't…your face… just like him..." the woman stammered. Tears were warming her cold cheeks as she lay the wailing child down on a thick patch of moss. "May Mythal protect you or the Dread Wolf take you, but I cannot keep you…not with _his_ face." The woman whispered wiping the wetness out of her face, striding out of the clearing without looking back. The babe's cries were sounding through the vastness of the forest accompanied by the howls of wolves searching the wilderness for easy prey.

Countless miles and times away the lone wolf was stirring in his ageless sleep, his nose itching at the intriguing scent rising up his nostrils as he sniffed the air around him, wondering. Pictures of moss and fire were appearing in front of his spectral eyes. A low growl was building up in his throat he hadn't used for such a long time. Stretching the old bones he inhaled deeply and went back to sleep with a sigh. There was still time.

 **Chapter 1: Skyhold**

„The Eagle is in her eyrie, if you're looking for her, Chuckles." The dwarf explained as he stormed past him out of the rotunda. "Where else would she be? Hiding away with an ancient and very fragile tome while her silly mutt is sniffing through my things, again!" The elf exclaimed agitated furrowing his brows. "Don't be too hard on her or the little furball. You know she had to make a tough decision after the incident with the mages. Not everyone agreed with her decision of taking them in as allies." "Little furball?! This slobbering monster seems to get bigger each day! The new servants are not the only ones shivering at his looks." the elf replied unnerved. "Yeah, but his loyalty towards her is unbroken. And he hasn't eaten anyone on our side…" Varric reassured him grinning. "..Yet" Solas added gritting his teeth. Still mad at the situation he was striding out of the buzzing main hall and into the courtyard. "Forget about that mongrel…" he grumbled. People were still criticizing the Inquisitor's decision to ally herself with the mages even though they knew they needed vast amounts of magical power to close the Breach? Those were definitely interesting times he had woken up to. "Magic can be a positive force, people seem to have forgotten that, too." he murmured. Spotting the Inquisitor wasn't hard at all. The hard part was getting to her. "How does she even get up there?" he asked himself shielding his eyes against the sun as he looked up at the newly renovated mage-tower. The copper strands in her blonde hair seemed to be drenched in fire by the late afternoon sun. Her lips were pursed and her eyebrows formed the curved line he now knew too well from their late-night studies. He didn't want to admit it to himself, nor could he, that he had come to crave their evenings together. She seemed to be so deeply buried in her far from easy read that the world could crumble around her and she wouldn't notice. Solas exhaled sighing. This picture of peace and serenity had been sucking his anger and frustration at her into the Void. "Do you want me to tell her to get down from there?" Cole's soft voice sounded suddenly right beside his left ear. "You startled me Cole!" he exclaimed surprised. "But yes, that would be very convenient." He added thankfully as the spirit disappeared once more. He was far too old to be scrambling up a tower to reach the maiden fair. But fair she was, at least to him. He caught himself drifting away in his thoughts once more, her moss green eyes in front of his inner eye speaking louder than any voices he had heard in his life. He felt himself drawn to her in a way he had never thought possible; not to anyone and especially not to someone from this world. The first time he had laid his eyes upon her, as she was still unable to wake up from her ordeals in the Fade, he already had a feeling that this…that _she_ would mean trouble. He had screwed up badly by giving the orb to Corypheus he knew that already. Now this mortal, a Dalish elf as they called themselves, had been touched by the Anchor and went physically into the Fade. This was an impossibility all by itself. He couldn't wake her up and was at his wit's end, something he hadn't experienced so far. And then one day as he sat beside her bed stroking a copper lock out of her face she had opened her moss-green eyes looking at him directly and that instant he knew it wasn't trouble but disaster. _Pictures of moss and fire…_ he thought, remembering the moment vividly. A moment he had dreamed about centuries ago. He watched as Cole sat himself beside her on the roof of the mage-tower whispering something in her ear and making her chuckle. With a big grin she waved at him happily as she began her climb down the tower's wall one-handed with the tome tucked between her left arm and her chest. Everything inside the elf began to rebel as he watched her dangling twenty feet over the stony ground and he made himself ready to cast a barrier spell to shield her in case she slipped. As her feet touched the ground with ease in front of him, smiling broadly, the tension fell away from him in an instant. "Will you _ever_ stop endangering yourself, Da'len? _1_ " he asked, gritting his teeth. Her eyes narrowed but the smile stayed where it was. "None of your business…Hahren. _2_ " She replied throwing the last word at him mockingly. She knew he hated being addressed as an elder, it made him _feel_ old. But he knew how much she hated being called a child, thus a smile formed at the corner of his lips. "You know how much I _detest_ you climbing up the towers. Roofs were meant for birds not little thieving elves." He replied scolding. Her glance was almost apologetic, for she knew how much he treasured the tomes. "I just borrowed it…" she replied meekly, handing him back the book on rift magic. _The mighty Inquisitor Alas Lavellan... Battling demons, fighting Red Templars and Venatori and rendering judgment upon the corrupted is looking at me like a scolded child._ Solas thought, his smile broadening. "It is fine, lethallan. _3_ We can continue to study together. _If_ you still wish to walk the path of the Rift Mage..." He offered. At his words her face lightened up, making him want to wrap his arms around her and never letting go of her again. "That would be great, Solas!" she exclaimed. "Although I have to go through another strategical meeting with Cullen first." She added looking at the sundial on the main tower. The sound of the commander's name out of her mouth sent a pang through his stomach. "Fenedhis! _4_ I'm late again." She cursed. Resting her hand on his shoulder she asked: "I'm sorry Solas. Is it all right if I drop by later?" "Always." he replied kindly as she turned on her heel to run up the stairs to the commander's office. The way the human looked at her left a nasty taste in his mouth and made him wish he would find someone else to direct his attention to. His own feelings towards her weren't right and the elf tried his best to keep them locked away in a safe spot of his heart, but with every day he spent with her studying, fighting or stalking through Thedas' wilderness it became harder to stay away, harder to think of her as just the bearer of the Anchor he needed so much. With a mind more troubled than before he returned to his desk flipping through the tome without so much as looking at the pages.

* * *

 _1 Little child; little one_

 _2 Elder_

 _3 Casual reference used for someone with whom one is familiar; female form_

 _4 common curse_

"Cullen I'm so sorry I'm late again. I was just…" she began, entering the dimly lit office. "…perching in your nest? Harding told me already. If I tell you the hundredth time to stop that, will you finally listen to your general?" he asked with a smirk on his face. "Well we both know the answer to that, don't we? Some people _do_ like the sun, you know. You should try it out sometime." she replied grinning and waving to the darkness around her. "Yes…" he said pointing at the chair in front of him. "Please take a seat, Inquisitor; I have something to tell you." "Has to be grave if I have to sit…and don't you call me Inquisitor!" she demanded dropping into the cushioned seat. "As you wish, my Lady. You know that I have been a member of the Templar Order…" _What the…? We already had this discussion._ The woman thought. "Yeah and you know that I'm a mage…Is this about the joining of the rebel mages? Again?! I thought we were on good terms?" she asked taken aback. Raising his hands the man replied reassuringly: "We are, don't worry. I understand why you let them join us freely and in fact it was a rather good decision. This is something different, however." he sat himself down opposite her at his massive wooden desk. His face became stern and his hands seemed to be trembling, the young woman noticed. All of a sudden a terrible feeling was running down her spine. She wanted to reach across the table for his hands, to comfort him, but feared he might find it highly inappropriate. Even if she _was_ the Inquisitor she was still an elf and a mage too, which may be far worse. Leliana told her what had happened in the Circle of Ferelden. How Lyanna Amell, the Hero of Ferelden, had found him trapped by the horrific abominations and tortured to the edge of losing his mind. She saw the looks he gave her while she and Solas or Dorian were training spells in the courtyard; he seemed ready to butt in any second with his shield raised high and ready to disrupt any spell she was casting. But he never did. She needed to train as much as she could; he knew that as well as she did. Back when she lived with clan Lavellan she hadn't been the Keeper's First and thus strictly prohibited from using any magic even though she was born a mage. Those were terrible days and every time she thought of it a knot formed in her stomach. She wanted to have nothing to do with the clan any longer, not after what they had done to her all those years. Pushing the rising tide of thoughts away she looked at the commander. After all their talks and all their verbal fights there was trust in his warm amber eyes. They have had their differences in the beginning and they still were having rather heated discussions over certain operations in the war room, causing Leliana and Josephine to leave the room once they saw it was leading nowhere and they were both just being stubborn. However he had shown her a form of kindness she hadn't been expecting from a human. Realizing that they had just been staring at each other for several minutes in silence she said: "You can tell me anything, Cullen. I hope you know that." His stern face lightened up at her words and a smile crept over his lips. "I know that." with a heavy sigh he continued. "Since you recruited the mages into our army a thought has come to my mind once more. I have told you only little about what has happened back in the Circle, but I think Sister Leliana has already told you everything there is to know. This is one reason why I watch you closely while you train your skills and I _am_ sorry if it disturbs you but it's an old habit and it's rather hard to get rid of it." He explained. "There is no need to apologize Cullen. I think it's good to know that at least someone is keeping a watchful eye on me. Wouldn't want to become possessed or anything…" "Don't!" he exclaimed agitated, jumping out of his chair all of a sudden and looking away "The thought of it alone is too horrible to bear…" he stammered, tearing his hair. "If I do this… then maybe I'll stop worrying so much about you." His words took her completely off-guard. "When you do _what_?" she asked taken aback. _He's worrying about me?_ The young elf thought, her heart racing. "I have stopped taking Lyrium for several weeks now. After I've seen what Red Lyrium has done to the knight-commander in Kirkwall and what it does to the Red Templars I want to have nothing to do with the stuff altogether…but it's hard." He explained his voice becoming a whisper. _Lyrium withdrawal_ … the young woman thought. The trembling hands, the headaches he had so often when they were meeting in the brightly lit war room. She took a good look at the dimly lit room. _That's why he hides in here all the time._ A pang of guilt shot through her heart as she remembered all the times she had teased him about his choice of accommodation and how she must have annoyed him with their endless discussions in the war room. "I had no idea!" she replied genuinely surprised. "Don't you _want_ to be a Templar any longer? To be able to use your powers for…you know…supervising the mages?" There was guilt and sorrow in his eyes as he answered: "I knew you wouldn't support this crazy idea. I apologize and I will start taking it immediately, my lady." Shaking her head vehemently and striding towards him, she exclaimed: "What no, no, no! Stop right there. If that's what you really want you have my full support. We have Cassandra who is already very eagerly supervising the mages and we don't lack Templar recruits. I just hope it doesn't cause you too much pain. If there is anything I can do…" She didn't know what had gotten into her head as she rested her hand soothingly upon his trembling shoulder. "I…uh…thank you, Ally." He muttered without looking her in the eyes. The room was so dark and her mind had to be imagining things, because the Inquisitor could swear that the battle-hardened warrior in front of her was actually blushing.

With more questions than answers Alas Lavellan left the commander's office into the fresh evening air. _That was more than weird…he has never called me "Ally" before…_ she thought furrowing her brow. "Ally" was the other nickname Varric had given her, if he didn't call her "eagle". The dwarf was one of the few who knew why she hated her real name "Alas". It was elvhen for earth or, if you were in an insulting mood, dirt.

" _Len'alas lath'din5!" the insults of the clan's hunters were sounding through the forest. Her soles were already burning from running but the elven girl still pressed on. She was used to them chasing her away as soon as they entered the wilderness to hunt for food. As always the Keeper had instructed her to go with the other hunters to hone her skills. Of course not her magical skills, she was strictly forbidden from casting any spells. Whether the Keeper knew that the others were always chasing her away, she didn't know and at this point she had stopped caring about anything that concerned the bunch of idiots who called themselves a "clan". After some time they always stopped and went about their own business in search for easier prey. Alas Lavellan slowed her pace, breathing heavily. "This will never stop." She murmured to herself. Since she could remember the clan-members were treating her like dirt. When she had been younger she always told herself she should be thankful they had taken her in, but since she had come of age and received her vallaslin, the symbol of Mythal by her own choice, she wasn't so sure about it anymore. Her Keeper, who had been the one to find her as a babe deep in the woods on the earthen ground, had given her the name "Alas". He had been good to her, until she had shown signs of magic. Every time she involuntarily had cast a spell he slapped her and instructed her to train with her daggers. Maybe he had hoped he could punch the magic out of her or make her stop using it once she became a decent rogue and hunter. "Screw them all." she grumbled, sitting herself down on a tree stump. Out of the inside of her fur vest she produced a small leather-bound book. "I will learn what I want. Maybe one day we come across some Templars. Then I'll cast some spells and they'll bring me to the Circle of Ferelden." She said dreamily. Alas had heard that the Circle was like a prison for mages, where they were allowed to learn, but not allowed to leave. "Why would I want to leave if I could be learning everything there is about magic?" she muttered running her fingers over the incantations on the worn paper smiling to herself._

"Now I really _can_ learn what I want." She stated as she opened the door to the rotunda and what she saw made heart jump and a smile spreading across her face. Resting his head between two immense piles of books, Solas was seemingly deeply buried in his dreams. _And how he loves them…I should leave him to it._ She thought as she crossed the room on her tiptoes. _Maybe Dorian is still up and willing to teach me more about lightning spells._ As she reached the first step to the tower a husky voice sounded behind her. "Where do you think you're going lethallan?" the elf asked her. "I didn't want to disturb you." The young woman replied apologetically. "Have I ever given you the impression that studying with you is disturbing me?" Solas said smiling. "How was your meeting with the commander?" he asked, his tone changing subtly. _A little weird, that's what it was._ She thought to herself, saying: "He told me that he's no longer taking lyrium. I think that's very brave considering his past and the amounts of mages living and training right in his vicinity." There was a flicker in Solas' eyes as he replied: "Well, let's hope he knows what he's doing. But enough of that… Come here, I have something to show you." he stood up from his wingchair, offering it to her. Her heart was rejoicing at his words as she sat down. Every time she came here he had something else to show her. Always some new interesting tome with unknown magic or runes he had found in the depths of Skyhold's library or on their journeys, while she was busy bickering with nobles or other dignitaries. "Alright, what is it?" she asked searching the desk with her eyes in excitement. "Well, it's not here. Let me show you, lethallan. Garas _6_." He replied softly taking her hand in his.

* * *

 _5 Child of dirt, no one loves_

 _6 come_

Snowflakes were floating down from the sky and melting in her hair as they walked amongst the buildings of Haven. "You found something here in Haven?" she asked him, taken aback and watching their surroundings wearily. Something seemed to be off, she thought to herself. "You can say that, Alas." he answered smiling as they came to halt in front of the chantry. The sound of her name stopped her thoughts. "You know I don't like that name, Solas." She stated averting her gaze from the buildings and turning around to face him. "When I call you that name, I don't mean to insult you lethallan." He explained gently. "To me it means earth; the one where all creatures come from and to which they will all return one day. The one supporting us with herbs and food which sate our hunger and where rivers flow which quench our thirst." His kind gaze was tracing her face slowly as he talked. "I…" she began, unable to form a coherent thought. "And yet you're so much more." He continued turning his eyes towards the sky. "As we have learned in the Fade at Adamant you have gotten the anchor by accident and still you managed it in a way I think nobody else could. Even though you weren't trained as a mage you possess a kind of willpower I haven't seen since…a very long time." He said, his voice becoming a whisper. "I'm just trying my best to _make_ the best of the situation, you know." She explained smiling at him. "Your best…" he began taking a step towards her. "You have already shaped the lives of countless of people, yet you're as humble as the day you opened your eyes back at Haven." "Without you I wouldn't have woken up at all." Alas replied her heart racing at their closeness. "I have done nothing, Alas. Nor could I. But when you opened your eyes I knew it was no coincidence the anchor fell to you. You have the power to change the world. And I feel I have to stand by your side." He explained stroking a strand of hair out of her face. The brushing of his fingers against her skin sent her back to the day she had woken up in Haven. Her dreams had been vivid back then although she remembered only glimpses now. Vast forests, a smell of pinewood and juniper-berries and in the distance a howl… The only thing she was sure of was that it had been his touch and his energy that had guided her back into this world. His face was so close to her that she could feel his warm breath on her lips making her want to… _It can't hurt, not here…_ she thought to herself.

"Alas…" he whispered, only to be interrupted by her lips pressing themselves on his own, hungrily. The sensation of softness and warmth washed over him. With the last spark of resistance he could muster up he pushed himself away from her, even though his heart screamed not to. "No…we shouldn't…" he muttered shaking his head. He was more than surprised when he saw the smirk forming on the corners of her mouth. Was this just a game to her? "Not even in the Fade, Hahren?" she purred biting her lower lip. _She knew?_ He asked himself staring at her in amazement. _Hahren…_ The way she had pronounced it this time made him growl inside, hungry for more, hungry for _her_. He knew this would mean more trouble and heartbreak he so desperately tried to avoid, but he couldn't resist. Not here, not anywhere. Wrapping his arms around her slender waist he drew her close to him, bending over to taste her once more, feeling her lips part in approval as he let his tongue discover her willingly. In the distance he could hear a dog's alert barking, which was making him prick up his ears for just a second until her teeth biting his lips were turning his attention back to the forbidden fruit in front of him.

The first rays of sunlight were tickling her nose as the young woman woke up in the morning. Taking a quick look around she realized she was in her own room, on her own bed and covered by a blanket. "How…?" she asked herself being unable to remember how she got here in the first place. She remembered exactly what had happened with Solas in the Fade and her heart skipped a beat when she thought of his embrace. _Didn't expect him to be so….possessive._ She thought grinning. "Had a good night's rest, Da'len?" his voice sounded through her room almost rocketing her out of the bed. "Solas, how…?" she began taken aback. "Who do you think brought you here, lethallan?" he asked smirking while striding over to her. "I see…so have you come to talk or are we past that part?" she purred. All of a sudden his face became a stern mask as he shook his head saying "We shouldn't do this…What happened in the Fade…" "…stays in the Fade?" she interrupted him. She saw the look he gave her. Was it regret or pity? Whatever it was but _this_ she didn't need. Not from anyone, not even from the person she respected the most. Putting the mask she had made herself and worn her entire life back on she stated: "I agree. We're better off just being friends, aren't we, Solas?"

The sudden bang of the door being slammed shut beside him made Varric look up from his correspondence. "What's eating our grumpy elf _this_ time?" he murmured to himself shrugging his shoulders and turning his attention back to the letters in front of him.

He should have rejoiced at her words and be glad she saw reason without him having to hurt her, but still… _We're better off just being friends._ Her words sounded through his head making the wolf inside him growl in anger. What was this? Him, the bloody Dread Wolf, harboring feelings for a mere mortal? For someone who wasn't even from his time, the time of Arlathan. The Anchor had drawn him to her, but her spirit… her spirit was what didn't allow him to leave. A feral howl built up in his throat as he remembered their kiss in the Fade. _What happens in the Fade doesn't_ _ **stay**_ _in the Fade! It's far more real than what we can experience here!_ He screamed inside his head, clenching his fists. Exhaling heavily he decided to go back into the Fade and consult some old friends. Wisdom and Purpose always found the right words to lead him back on his path.

 **Chapter 2: Ambush**

Somewhere in the wilderness of Orlais the campfire was cracking, warming her sore muscles and bones. Alas Lavellan was more than exhausted and it had been a rough day for all of them. Bull was snoring like there were no tomorrow and Varric was cleaning Bianca like he always did when the day's work was done, his eyes dropping shut every now and then. The Red Templars had gained a strong foothold in this part of Orlais and put up one hell of a fight. Their plan had been to drive them out of the lands by taking Suledin Keep away from them, though the Inquisitor had seen soon enough that this was a fight for another day. Ghilas, her loyal mabari, was letting out a heavy sigh, his head resting on her lap as he slept. Stroking him gently behind the ears made him let out a satisfied grumble. "Ally darling, why aren't you sleeping? Not that you actually _need_ any beauty sleep, sweetheart." Dorian whispered, sitting himself next to her and covering both of them with a soft woolen blanket. "Charmer!" she exclaimed smirking at him. "I just though how useful it would be if I could cast that bloody stonefist-spell. We could just smash our way into the Keep. Solas is awfully busy these days." She sighed. Three weeks had gone by since their kiss and the elf had been more brooding than ever and had become less talkative. If he talked to her at all he always seemed to be lecturing her and this was starting to get on her nerves really fast so she'd decided to stop asking him to train her to become a Rift Mage. To top it all off, Ghilas seemed to be even more on the outs with him than usual; growling and hissing at the elf as soon as he uttered a rare word to her. This whole situation was stupid. She _was_ the Inquisitor, the bloody Herald of Andraste and she needed to hone her skills and specialize herself. She felt like she was back with her old clan all over again, sneaking around the rotunda and snatching books from under his nose to read them in private. At least Solas had stopped scolding her for taking his tomes with her. However it was really hard, if not to say impossible, to learn that kind of magic from merely reading books. Even with Ghilas by her side, day and night… Dorian couldn't help her with this either, because he knew nothing about that kind of magic and her relationship with Vivienne had suffered a serious blow after she had called her a pretentious witch dressed in Orlesian curtains after the Iron Lady had told her that she was no real mage if she hadn't been trained in one of the Circles. However her real concern was her relationship with Solas. They had gotten along so well and that Fade-kiss had ruined everything it seemed. She hadn't even been aware, that she harbored that kind of feelings for him. She looked up to him and enjoyed spending time with him and loved his stories about the Fade and ancient history, but she hadn't thought she'd ever have romantic feelings for him. She never had for anyone so far… but the way he had pulled her towards him and the eagerness and hunger in his kiss had made shivers run down her spine and even now when she thought about it her head felt dizzy. If he didn't want her that way at least they should be on good terms; she needed him for the upcoming battles. "I really don't know what you see in that scrawny, grumpy elf, Ally. Especially if there is someone else pining for your attention? And such a gorgeous hunk of a man he is, our commander." Dorian's voice became dreamy. "I wonder what he looks like under all that armor and fur…" he added, pursing his lips. Ah yes, Cullen… that had also been a very interesting development. Since their talk in his office he seemed even kinder to her than he already was. He didn't even try to convince her of his point of view concerning the Inquisition's movements, but actually came to her when there was a new development. They saw each other rather often these days, the Inquisitor noticed, and it didn't bother her at all. "At the moment my only interest is to claim that bloody keep for the Inquisition…" The arrow would have pierced right through her heart had Dorian not erected the barrier so quickly. "What the…?" Varric's voice sounded over the feral cries surrounding them. "Ambush!" Alas cried out. Jumping up she reached for her staff, casting a protective barrier over Bull and the dwarf. Dorian slowed time for them and the picture rolling out in front of her made her gasp. How could they not have seen them coming? She could make out three archers standing on a high vantage point and raining down arrows upon them and setting their tents on fire. A bunch of foot soldiers were charging at the Qunari who had just enough time to reach for his massive sword. "Katara, bas! _7_ " he growled, carving a bloody path through his opponents. The dwarf alongside him vanished from their view appearing next to her a few seconds later, unloading his crossbow on the attackers under curses and grunts. A sudden flash of red light made her look up just in time to block the rogue's dagger-attack with her staff. Ghilas' charge took the Templar Shadow off-guard, pushing it to the ground. The mabari went straight for the thing's throat, tearing chunks out of the corrupted flesh under hisses and shrieks. Her own attacks were quick but unfocused as she tried to strike down multiple Templars at once with her lightning attacks. Few moments had passed when the young elf realized that they were completely outnumbered as well as trapped inside the clearing. She could see the wear and tear marking the faces of her fighting companions who were all out of stamina after the rough day. There was only one way out of this. _This is going to hurt…_ she thought, gritting her teeth. Solas had warned her many times not to use the anchor too often, for he still didn't know the exact effects this might have on her. The only effect she had noticed so far was that it hurt madly when she used it. It was a horrible pain, which became worse and lasted longer every time she used the anchor. But he wasn't here, thus he had no say in this. Not this time and in fact: never. _If he doesn't want to teach me, I'll have to do it myself, as always._ Rage spurred her on as she tore open the Veil.

All around them their attackers cried out in agony as chunks of them were sucked into the Fade. He had seen it many times now but he never thought he would be getting used to it. The young elf was standing in the middle of the green hue putting all her remaining mana and willpower into the Rift she had just created. Foes that tried attacking her were thrown back several feet and unable to reach her. Turning his attention back to the agonized attackers Dorian conjured lightning bolts to finish them off. The tide was turning for their benefit, but all of a sudden another voice joined the chorus of tormented screams and shrieks around them. "Ally!" he cried out as he saw her face distorted from pain. Tears were streaming down her cheeks and her left arm was trembling severely as she was trying to hold the rift open. "Pashaara _8_ , Inquisitor! Close it!" he heard Bull's voice over the battle-ground. "Why isn't she stopping?" the dwarf asked shooting the last Templar down. All that could be heard now were the Inquisitor's cries in the night and the sounds of the Rift she was still holding open. "She can't…" Dorian muttered, jumping through her shield and to her side. "I'm sorry, Ally…" he added using the last bit of his Mana for a mind-blast, which knocked her out cold.

* * *

 _7 Die, thing!_

 _8 Enough_

 **Chapter 3: Out again**

"Let me through at once!" Solas shouted at the top of his lungs at the commander who was blocking the way into the infirmary. "I will let you through once you calm yourself, mage." He stated dryly without moving an inch. Snarling, the elf glared at the human. "No ordinary healing can help her now. Get this into your head and let me help, templar!" he hissed. "You haven't talked to her in _weeks_ and now she's almost dying you come to save the day?" Cullen scoffed, adding: "Some kind of friend you are…" That was the final straw. "Friend… is that what _you_ are? Don't get me wrong human, but from the outside it seems like you are just trying to get into her pants." Solas replied snarling. Out of the corner of his eye he could see the commander's knuckles turn white, just like his own. _He won't know what hit him._ He thought to himself. " _What_ did you just say?!" Cullen hissed back. Drawing himself up to his full height and closing the gap between them, Solas whispered into his ear: "Do you _really_ think she could ever love a human? A templar to top it all off?" he had to suppress a laugh. "I'll tell you this one time and one time only: back off!" There was confusion and anger in the commander's eyes as he glared at him and Solas was more than ready to defend himself. "What's the meaning of all this?" a female voice sounded behind them. "Ah Solas…come in quickly, we need your expertise and help in here." The Seeker stated, looking concerned. Pushing himself past the glaring man he could barely hear his words: "Your luck, Solas." Once more he had to suppress a laugh. _If you just knew…your confidence would dwindle considerably._ He thought entering the dimly lit infirmary. "I need more light." He demanded and Cassandra hurried away. Locking the door behind the Seeker, he turned around to face her. There she lay, just like the day he had first met her at Haven. A beacon radiating warmth and hope in this dead and frozen world. But her flame was about to go out if he didn't act. "Why did you use it to this extend, Alas?" he whispered, sitting himself on the edge of her bed and taking her ice-cold hand into his. _This is partly your fault, my friend. And a big part it is…_ Wisdom's voice sounded in his head. _You should have trained her, prepared her. Now she wanders the path of fear and darkness alone!_ Purpose joined in judgingly. _She's not alone._ _ **He's**_ _with her. But I still agree with you, my brother._ The Spirit of Wisdom stated dryly. " _Who_ is with her?" Solas asked puzzled. _My dear wolf, I though you knew by now. One of my children has been with her for some time now, getting bigger and stronger each day. With each scroll she reads and each book she's hitting he's becoming more powerful and more protective of her. He has been by her side for seven years now, I think…_

 _The light of day was slowly dying away, drenching the forest into a warm orange glow. "Almost time to return to camp now." Alas Lavellan murmured to herself, sighing. She dreaded the thought of returning to the clan every evening, but a night alone in the Brecillian Forest seemed even worse. Slowly she packed the borrowed books, the collected herbs and tucked away her blades as she heard the noise. Closing her hands around the daggers' hilts firmly, she pricked up her ears in alarm. It was a rustling in the bushes, faint but still audible. A small animal… maybe a squirrel or a wildcat, or something else entirely. It was the Brecillian Forest after all and not your average wood. Fenedhis… she thought to herself while sneaking in the direction the noise came from. At least her rogue training brought the merits of being able to move undetected and unhindered. She could hear the sounds now more clearly. There was a low whimpering accompanying the rustling now and a menacing growling sound. The young wolf didn't know what hit him when the blade hit his back and the pain shot through his body making him howl in agony. Alas hissed at the beast slashing her daggers in its direction, making it back off slowly. Once the injured wolf disappeared into the thicket she turned her attention to the picture of misery on the forest ground. Gently she stroked the whimpering pup behind its gnawed ears. A heavy sigh escaped her lips as she saw the injuries the wolf had inflicted on the newborn mabari. Its honey brown fur was caked with dark patches of blood. He needed treatment soon or he wouldn't make it. "How did he get separated from his mother?" She asked herself, looking around her in hope for the bitch to turn up, in vain. In the distance she could hear the pack howling loudly. "Word travels fast in the forest, especially among hungry wolves." A deep voice beside her remarked, making her jump up in surprise. A blue, roughly humanoid shaped, glow was hovering next to the injured pup. Pointing her daggers defensively in the spirit's direction she drew herself up to her full height. "What do you want, Elgar? Leave the little one alone!" the young elf exclaimed putting herself in front of the mabari. The pup was trying to turn his head around to look at her, but only a howl of pain came out of his mouth. "Aneth ara, Alas. I won't harm the dog; I just want to learn… it is what I am. And I have learned so much from you already." It told her. Confusion was spreading through her brain as she eyed the spirit suspiciously. "You're a Spirit of Learning, aren't you? I have sensed you many times while I was reading. Why are you showing yourself just now?" she asked. Another whimper came from the little heap on the ground making a knot form in her stomach. "It is too weak and won't make it, I'm afraid, unless…" it replied. "Unless what? You possess its body? You think I will let you?" she hissed. "I don't think you could stop me, not yet. But I won't force myself onto the unwilling." It explained calmly. A thought spread in her mind like wildfire and she was unable to stop herself from uttering the following words: "If you help the little one to recover could you also teach me…magic?" she whispered. "If you let me accompany you on your journeys, Alas, learning will come natural to you. Spells and incantations won't remain a secret for long." The spirit replied. "And what about you? Won't you become stronger by this, too?" the young elf asked skeptically. "Of course, it's in the nature of Spirits, Da'len." The wolves' howling in the background became louder and more menacing. Removing her woolen scarf Alas Lavellan made a decision. Kneeling right next to the pup she whispered: "Come here little one. Don't be afraid, I know how it feels to be abandoned in this wood, so I won't leave you." The trembling pup calmed down as soon as it was wrapped in her scarf, letting out a heavy breath. "I agree, Elgar, but only if you help this little pup to recover and grow strong. And don't ever call me Da'len again." she stated. "As you wish. You can call me Ghilas, master." the spirit replied bowing and disappeared into the pup's body._

"A Spirit of Learning… how could I not have seen it? How was she able to hide it from me for so long?" Solas exclaimed. _Which answer would you prefer?_ Wisdom asked him. "The honest one, my friends." The elf whispered into the dark, without averting his glance from her sleeping face. _They're both learning quickly and only by cunning and cleverness the young elf has come this far, but there is more to it. Maybe you weren't able to see it because you are distracted. You are trying so hard to push your feelings away, so hard to avoid seeing what she truly is: more than just the Anchor. You think that this world is a frozen wasteland, its people merely empty husks wandering aimlessly through the biting cold. Their minds shrouded in darkness and unable to see the light that once was._ Wisdom explained calmly. _You think you have only one destiny that awaits you in this world, but things have changed…with her. You fell in love and she is making you see everything with different eyes. This world isn't the empty wasteland you want it to be, not anymore. You don't want to acknowledge this, wolf, but it's the truth. The only truth there ever was. Although it is your decision what you do with it, as always._ Purpose stated. After a few moments he felt both Spirits leaving and exhaled heavily. "They are right, vhenan." He muttered, brushing her hand gently with his lips, deeply inhaling her sweet scent. "Why must it be you? If there were a maker I'd say he wanted to test me…" he added scoffing. "I'm afraid I will fail this test." Taking her hand which was holding the anchor into his own one, he whispered apologetically: "This will hurt a little, love."

The pain shot through her arm and right into her chest. A scream built up in her sore throat as the young elf opened her eyes. Her heart was racing madly and her head felt as if it was about to burst into a thousand pieces as she tried to sit up. A gentle hand was pushing her back towards the mattress, slowly but determined. "You need to rest, Alas." Solas' low voice sounded right next to her ear. "What happened?" she asked, pressing her eyes shut in agony. "I don't feel so great…" she muttered. The sound of his laughter astonished her even more than the fact that he was still resting his hand on her shoulder. "How could you, little bird? You have used up all your Mana to hold up that Rift and then you were unable to close it. But you're here now and that's all that matters." He said with relief. "What…?" she began, completely flustered. Reopening her eyes, her gaze fell directly into grey ones only inches away from her face. There was no trace of reproach or anger at her in them, just gladness and relief. The warm smile he gave her made her heart skip a beat, again. _No, not this again. That can't be good._ She thought to herself, trying to calm down as she realized how the redness shot into her cheeks involuntarily. She wanted to back away, to push him away, but she couldn't. "I have to apologize, Alas. I have been acting untoward for the last few weeks. You don't deserve this" Unable to reply anything to his apology the young elf simply glared at him. _Damn right I don't._ She screamed in her head, without uttering a word. "I would like to make it up to you… if that's still possible." He said without averting his eyes from hers. "How?" Alas demanded, genuinely surprised and intrigued by his offer. "I will teach you everything I know about Rift Magic and magic in general; if you're willing. There won't be any more surprises, Alas." A smirk came over her lips as she eyed him up. "I highly doubt that, Solas, but I still will accept your offer, you know my boundless generosity. However I must ask you to release my hand, it feels numb already." She said, smiling inwardly as she noticed his pale cheeks reddening.

 **Chapter 4: Training**

 _The day will come when I have to leave you and I shouldn't make it harder than it already is…but all this: the time I spend with you, the time I dream about you… it makes me feel alive._ Solas thought dodging her incoming attack with ease. "Focus lethallan! It is supposed to break down gates and even stone walls. Now the only thing you may be breaking is your own fingernail." He shouted at her. "My fingernails are of no concern to you, old hermit!" she hissed with a grin on her face. "That was low. I would be expecting something like this from the Tevinter and not from your Serene Highness." He replied jokingly. She had been making progress quickly, with help from her Spirit of Learning, no doubt. However, he still couldn't keep himself from teasing her; the reactions were just too priceless. The disputes and fights they've had seemed to be forgotten as they trained in the courtyard. Even the commander seemed to have stopped bothering them while they were casting spells. "Alright, I think this is enough for today. You look exhausted and I am sure you have tons of other things to settle before you can finally rest." He said with a smile, even though he didn't want their training to end. "Of course, I am the bloody Inquisitor. There is always some matter that needs my attention desperately. I think we've run out of turnips and I need to write a petition to the viscount of Turnipville to get more." The young elf replied, rolling her eyes unnerved. "I want to show you something first; a new spell. Although I don't want to hurt you… I haven't tested it before." She added. "Alas, I _am_ able to summon a decent barrier so go ahead and show me!" he replied, readying his defenses. It was beginning to get dark and his barrier drenched the almost empty courtyard into a blue light. "Maybe I should call Dorian first, just in case…" Alas began with concern in her green eyes. "Just cast your spell. We don't have all day, Da'len!" he told her, louder than he should have.

The spell's force hit him hard and completely unexpected. One second his body was dangling in thin air, hovering over the castle and the next it was accelerated quickly towards the solid earthen ground. He had no time to react. No barrier he knew would make the impending impact any better nor save him from the broken bones. Of course he could heal them instantly afterwards, but that would raise suspicions. He braced himself for the impact and the following pain, as he heard her yell and casting the next spell, the very instant he hit the ground. To his surprise it wasn't hard at all, but soft like down. "Solas! Ir abelas9!" her voice cried out to him. The sound of her speaking the language of his people made shivers run down his spine. "Are you alright?" she kneeled right next to him. "I think I am, though I don't know how." He admitted. "Alteration magic. I didn't think it would ever be this useful." She explained, while inspecting his body for injuries, quick and gently. He was unable to object. "Andraste's ass what are you two doing here?!" Varric's voice sounded behind them. "I know you two have your differences, but shooting the elf into the sky seems rather harsh, Ally!" he said scolding. "It was an accident, Varric!" Alas replied, still out of breath. "An accident is when you fall off your horse, or battle-nug or whatever you think you need to ride these days, but not if you're propelled into the bloody sky, sheesh!" the dwarf exclaimed flabbergasted. "I'm alright, Varric. Thanks to the Inquisitor's quick thinking." He managed. "But I think I'll need some rest now. This turned out to be a very unexpected and eventful day." He added smiling.

Her heart was still racing in her chest and her legs were shaking madly as she helped him stand up. "Ar enfenim ma… _10_ " she muttered under her breath as she lead him into the castle. Everyone seemed to be concerned with their affairs and didn't mind them at all as they were passing through the great hall. Varric returned to his letters after telling them to settle their disputes another way or someday someone might really get hurt. That comment made her feel even guiltier than before. "I know how you hate tea, but I have a special blend in my chambers. It calms the nerves rather quickly." She said under her breath. "If I can have wine with that I think it'll help even faster." He replied as he followed her through the wooden door.

* * *

 _9 I'm sorry!_

 _10 I feared for you!_

The copper pot was steaming over the fireplace, untouched. He had declined the tea but accepted the wine thankfully, swirling the glass slowly. They had drawn the chairs closely to the warming fire and were both staring into the bickering flames, taking the occasional sip from their glasses. This went on for the whole bottle and half of the second one too, when he broke the silence first. "You really don't need to be sorry, Alas. It was a pretty impressive spell." He stated, the wine making his tongue heavy as he spoke. "I almost _killed_ you Solas. I could never forgive myself if something happened to you on my watch." She replied finishing her wine and pouring more into both their glasses. The concern in her voice and the terror in her eyes; nobody had ever been afraid for him. Afraid _of_ him yes… but this… He got a hold of her free hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. "I'm alright, little bird. Please stop torturing yourself." "Ma melava halani11, Solas. And I repaid you with _this_?" she burst out, jumping out of her seat and walking to the fireplace, shakily. He could hear her sobbing. "Venavis12!" he exclaimed, walking with great strides towards her. He had never seen her like this. She, the Inquisitor, a bastion of calm in the raging storm never cried, never faltered. As he wrapped his arms tightly around her she buried her face into his chest making his heart race madly. _I need to leave…_ he thought to himself as he buried his own face into the thick of her copper locks. The smell of fresh lemon and elfroot rose up his nose, making his insides scream for more. He knew it wasn't right, he knew it wasn't fair. Not towards her nor himself but his heart had ached for too long. "Ar lath ma, vhenan.13" He whispered as he cupped her face in his hands. Still teary-eyed she looked at him, giving him the smile which made him throw all caution to the winds. "Dirth, ma'arlath.14" Her voice sounded beside his ear.

He had pushed her against the wall as soon as she had uttered the words. Hungry lips discovered her face, her mouth, her neck, while she was unable to resist any of it. His gaze was filled with lust and greed, undressing her with his eyes as his hands journeyed down her back. Alas knew this was partly the wine's fault, but what was the saying: in wine there is truth? All of a sudden his lips stopped and he took a step back, swaying a little from side to side, looking her directly into the eyes. "I've been trying to be kind…hold back…we shouldn't do this." He muttered under his breath. A laugh overcame her as she said: "And _I_ am torturing myself? Says the god of self-chastisement…" Pulling him back to her by his necklace she whispered into his ear: "Mala suledin nadas ma'arlath, Solas. 15"

He couldn't have stopped even if she had told him to now. His insides howled in hunger for her touch and the feeling of her lip's warmth against his skin. She was his and his alone. How long he had been waiting for this he didn't know but it seemed like an eternity, and more. As he fumbled around with the openings of her leather vest he had to suppress an impatient growl. Her hands were quick to help him with his task and the cloth dropped down to the floor. His woolen shirt was far less resistant as he pulled it over his head with one sweep. As if they had a life of their own, his feet began guiding them towards her bed, while his lips couldn't let go of hers. Her sigh as he lay her down on the soft mattress made his skin tingle with excitement. He had imagined how it would feel holding her this close to him, while wandering the Fade and watching her as she lay dreaming, though it couldn't even come close to the sensation which was filling him now from head to toe. His skin was burning where she caressed him, making him want more with every touch and every kiss he received. As he freed her breasts from their confinement a sigh escaped her trembling lips. The sighs turned into moans as he brushed the rosy hills with his tongue, first slowly then eagerly, making his way down her belly. "Ar nuvenin ma. _16_ " He heard her voice call out to him, filled with lust, as he stopped at her hip bones. The wolf inside him howled impatiently as he felt her legs wrap around his hips and pulling him against her body. "Tel'venavis sahlin, emm'asha.17" He whispered in her ear as his hand found his way into her pants. The hotness between her legs and the moans of pleasure coming out of her mouth as he explored her with his fingers, made a growl escape his lips. She sat up on the bed quickly, her hands greedily pulling at his pants. "Slowly, vhenan. _18_ " He exclaimed as she undressed him completely. She hissed at him, actually _hissed_ at him, and lowered her head to plant a kiss on the hardness between his legs. Not even in his dreams he had dared imagining the things her hands and tongue did to him right now. The way she touched him made him wonder for how long _she_ had been beset by hunger for this, for _him_. But he wouldn't give in… not that easily at least. He wanted to have her; _his_ way. Pulling her upwards by the shoulders, he rolled her body beneath his own, pinning her hands down with his and making her unable to move. He took up her features with his eyes, trying to save the picture inside his mind. Why she had chosen him for this he couldn't understand. She was a beauty, not only among elves. Her copper locks framed her face in fire radiating warmth and comfort; her moss green eyes reminded him of the vast forests of Arlathan and freedom… The vallaslin19 of Mythal was etched into her smooth and beautiful cheeks, scarring her in a way she didn't yet know, without taking any beauty away from her. _One day I will tell you, and I will set you free, vhenan._ He thought as he caressed the markings with his lips. He felt the wetness between her tights as she wriggled underneath him, trying to break free of his grasp. "By the Dread Wolf just take me already!" she demanded, her green eyes piercing him scolding. She didn't need to tell him twice, not like this. "Ma nuvenin.20" He said, giving her what they both needed

* * *

 _11 You helped me_

 _12 Enough_

 _13 I love you my heart._

 _14 I know, I love you._

 _15 Now you must endure._

 _16 I want you._

 _17 Be patient , my girl._

 _18 heart_

 _19 Blood writing  
_

 _20 As you wish_


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